Thursday, October 06, 2005
Holding Pattern
I feel something. It's on the tips of my fingers, hovering over the keys. I'm just waiting (impatiently) for the moment when they'll start tapping; telling me the story that's itching in me, so close to me that I can't see it until the words are on the screen.

This is my process. It's not scientific. It's not practical (especially when there are deadlines to be met...) and it's not easy. It's messy, it's undisciplined and it's annoying as hell when you're sitting in this holding pattern - feeling the vibrations of something starting to rumble their way through you while you sit and wait for the words to just explode.

I wish I could be one of those writers who sit at a computer and pound out word for word the story that is already clearly written in their minds eye. My stories are never written before I sit at the computer, or at a café table, or on a couch with a mug of cocoa and a notebook. I write them as though I'm reading them for the first time myself. The only trouble is, just as I have no time to sit and finish a good book these days; my opportunities to sit for an hour or two, undisturbed, and write are nonexistent.

As a result, all of my writings lately are fragmented and incredibly frustrating.

And on that note, I'd better get back to sitting and waiting for my fingers to attack the blank page (before my son wakes up from his nap and I lose everything all together.)



Blogger Teri said...

I so hear that!

Blogger Bill said...

My thoughts usually begin early in the morning when I wake, or when I am taking a walk and nowhere near a pen, paper, or computer. Often I will stop and ask to borrow a pen to scribble down the thought that burns in my soul to write about. That is how the majority of my work comes to life. My first book will hit the stands this month thanks to the grace of God and sobriety. The gift we share as writers in exposing our soul to the world comes from humility and the intense need to share. Isn't it wonderful! Know that others admire your work.



Blogger Skye said...

I can totally relate to that sentiment! My writing has been fragmented for the past ten years, since my son was born! Frustrations galore.

I stumbled on your blog a couple of days ago and have bookmarked it... hope that's okay. I enjoy reading it.

Blogger Mella said...

Bill~ thank you for your kind words and encouragement. Congratulations on your sobriety and your upcoming book!

Terry & Skye ~ Thank you both for sympathizing with me! Although, Skye, I wish you had told me that it gets better - not that I'll still be frustrated and fragmented ten years down the line! =)

Oh well, a paperback copy of my writing will never hug me or love me as much as my son... I'll take comfort in that for now. (Ask me again in fifteen years...)

And by all means, bookmark away! I'm flattered!

Hi Mella,

Hope the mail is posted, and your finding time to dive into those apples this weekend!
There is certainly an art to catching the fragments, and getting the time to put them all together. I'm sure you will find your way, catching hugs as you go. :)

Have a great weekend!

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