Leave it to Uma

Yesterday was the procedure; and I made it through the entire process without crying. Not that I wasn't sad, it's just that this is something I can't change, I can only accept. So, I took deep breaths and thought of the boss at home waiting for me.

I smiled and assured the nurse that it was ok that she had trouble with my veins and had to stick both arms with the IV needle. I politely laughed at the odd humor of the google-eyed man who came to have me sign a waiver before giving me my anesthetic. I woozily thanked the woman who wheeled me back from the operating room and I even gratefully thanked the nurse who unhooked my IV and explained to me that I'm O positive, and I should remember that.

Breath deeply. Think of happier things. Napping beside my son. The warmth of my husband's hand softly holding mine. Quiet moments of blue-gray light falling through the window early on Christmas mornings. Spring afternoons, lying beneath an arch of apple blossoms. My back pressed against a warm wooden dock; my legs dangling, toes dipping in cool water. Exhale.

Yes, I made it through the entire day without crying. Until late last night, laying on the couch, watching Kill Bill Volume II with my head resting on my husbands lap. Leave it to me to make it through an entire emotional day - dry eyed, only to be sobbing and reaching for the tissues while watching Uma Thurman kick butt.